Thursday, December 29, 2016

Last Christmas I gave you my heart

      This Christmas I got the most amazing gifts. Except the 2000 piece mandala coloring puzzle for my little cousin. No idea how that works, didn't think it through.
      Pup dope soap on a rope for brother & his fiance. Founders of Dope on a rope soap.
      The best of all was from the heart.
A scrapbook for my faja of his mother's childhood - now.
      I've made family scrapbooks but this one was special.

      Because we know nothing of her side of the family.
Thanks to my great grandpa changing his last name...

      Last month my wonderful cousin informed me my grandma's childhood pictures still existed. Gave me prints. Here's a few of my favorites.


One of two pictures of my great grandpa. My grandma on the far right
Notice the smile on his face? It's sincere. Unposed. Pure happiness. I Love it. Rare for the 1920's.


Grandma on the left with her tap shoes. Explains the dancing in my blood.


Does every grandma have a sexy beach pic? Mine do. I'd like to hang them up framed side by side.

       Given a picture of my great grandpa's obituary card too. Obviously
I gave the cemetary a call. Found his grave location, year he died, and his middle name

      Ironically my faja got me a DNA testing kit for christmas. You send it in, tells your ethnicity percentages.

      This will be an excellent 2017 adventure for my family and I.

Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Patience, it's a virtue

      Destination, psych doc. ETA, ...late. I'd have to wait 3-months to see him if I didnt make it. Fitting in a gas and cigarette stop on the way.

      My man finished getting gas, next comes avoiding rush hour. As we roll out, an unexplainable noise came came along with us. Followed by a car horn. I assumed we got hit. No more delays damnit.
      My man got out, discovering he drove with the car still connected to the gas pump. Then took that shit out, chucked it back, checked the car, no issues. Off we go.

      Then the old dudes

      One blocked the car as the other held the driver door open.
      We both just let them bitch. Looking away pondering. I pondered at least, about the estimated time of arrival. Then I heard one say the word police.

      Hell. No.
      No time.

      I juuuust wanted to skid out. Whispered "...just go".

      Instead, he got out of the car. Screwed the nozzle back on over the broke part of the pump. No gas was leaking so we left. The men still screaming shit we cant understand, but I think they thanked us in a way.

      It took a good 5-minutes before we started laughing, making what just happened not so casual anymore. Now that I think of it, I've only seen that shit in movies.

        We ended up half an hour early to my appointment. The doc was running behind. I sat a good 60-minutes in the waiting room.

      Patience. It's a virtue.

Monday, October 24, 2016

Micaela & Micaela Halloween talk

Thursday 
*While dancing in front of the mirror to the ABC'S on her boom box.*

Micaela, Halloween is coming up!

Yes it is mini me, do you know what you're gonna be?

A fire fighter!

Huh. Cool dude.

What are you going to be?

Dunno kid. Maybe a mermaid...but I mean...I'm supposed to be something, like, dead. Or a monster. Scary ya know?

A dead mermaid?

.....girrrrrl. That'd be tough. But maybe.


Friday
*While checking out of the pretend grocery store*

You still being a fire fighter for Halloween lil miss?

No, I'm being a police officer!

Ohh, sweet....

You're being a dead mermaid!?

You know it. 


Saturday
*While walking her to the library*

So lil miss, you decide for Halloween yet?

I want to be Wonder Woman!

Stopped that stroller real quick

....yes...uhm. How did you hear about Wonder Woman???

She's a super hero, like daddy!


      Took our daily adventure to the library. 
      Told the librarian, checked out every Wonder Woman book in the kids section. 

      Told mini me I'd help make her costume. That all the kids her age will be peppa pig, paw patrol characters, or princesses while she's going to stand out.  Even went to the extent of stating she may get more candy for it. 
      In he end, she's being a fire fighter...her preschool doesn't allow any super hero related clothes in general. Today I may bring some supplies to make her a Wonder Woman costume while telling the story of her. 
      Maybe that will influence her to wear it trick or treating. 

      What 3-year-old in 2016 knows of Wonder Woman!? She hasn't even been in the recent DC movies. 

Still contemplating what I'm going to be...
      Any suggestions? 

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Cooking and Spanish with Dr.Seuss

Told my man Friday I was trying a new recipe for dinner. He came home to this.

*Insert picture of cooked green eggs and Ham on the stove, aside the book here*
Or click here to see actual picture.


I had made actual dinner, sitting on counter.

      Also, I've been Micaela's nanny still. After school and the break for Jewish holiday's recently. Been keeping up with my teachings of Dr.Seuss of course. To my surprise, I came across a bin of his books. Told Micaela it's story time. Surprised again after noticing they were all in Spanish. I only read Green Eggs and Ham since I've memorized it in English. " Huevos verdes con jamón" 
      Soon I'll be able to express negative feelings towards green eggs and ham in Spanish. All I have memorized is "Juan Roman" (Sam I am). She totally listened to the book as I spoke in my horrible Spanish attempt. I can't roll my tongue worth shit.

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Time of my life


I can't even...
When I'm getting ready to leave for work I mute the television and put on music. These are reasons why. Big credits to those who created this video. 

Monday, September 26, 2016

The nose knows



Another hula hoop progress video.
Finally, I can hula hoop on my nose.
These are the reasons I have yet to make Mitch that bodies video.
Making sure my tricks will be slick.

I've never asked...

Does anybody else enjoy toys made for children?
You know you do. Please, do share.

Thursday, September 15, 2016

A few of my favorites on Etsy


      Once upon a time browsing on Etsy, ran into a hula hooping bunny in space sticker. Obviously I bought it. Various other goodies were included! Always get extras with my purchases.

I share with you my favorites by dethpsun
No, this is not sponsored content. Hakuna matata.

 

 

Stickers - $1.00
Magnets - $4.00
Prints - varies

You can also find shirts, bags and wallets.
Besides what I've shared, what's your favorite item by dethpsun?

Monday, September 12, 2016

Hula hoop progress - Shoulders


Hula hoop stuff update



Finally  accomplishing various shoulder breaks.
Thank God I was more of an upper body hula hooper. 
On the contrary, there's a reason my videos don't contain lower body hooping...


'Bodies' video shall come, as I promised. 
I'm just never satisfied with my choreography. 

Sunday, September 11, 2016

Roses are rainbow

 

      Give me flowers and they'll be under the faucet daily. Not all are the flower type of gal, but I sure am. My man brought me a dozen rainbow roses. 
Whaaaaat? 

 

      The petals aren't dyed with coloring. Rainbow roses are created by letting the flower grow in colored water made with plant extracts. The leaves were even colorful! Other flowers that can successfully use the same process include carnations, orchids (select breeds), hydrangea and a few others. 

 

      I never fail to mess up the whole "dozen" display. Put one in a vase with flowers collected. Another I give to a friend. 

Are you a flower type of gal? 
If you're a man, do you treat your lady with flowers?

Thursday, September 1, 2016

Last week with mini me


      The beginning

      She's awoke from a nap. The bedroom door opens. Approaching the door with a smile, it slams in my face. Grasping the door handle she continues to slam it in my face. 
Once, twice, I begin to lose count.

      Now I grasp the handle. Let myself in slowly, and sit on the floor. She begins pushing me out. Pretending her strength works only until I'm in front of the door again. 
      Screams, cries, punches, kicks. As if I'm the living nightmare she awoke from. Begins to strike the floor and walls. 
      Tell her not to hurt herself. Lecture her with words she didn't know existed. After 10-minutes, her mother (who works at home) is the only way to calm her down. As I grab a craft from her room she cries to her mom.

"I don't want Micaela to take good care of me!"
I froze, almost in tears..

      Her dad returns home from work an hour before I'm off. Expecting an hour to himself, mini me grasps to him. Inquiring when I'm leaving. 



The middle

      She's awoke from a nap. The bedroom door opens. Approaching the door with a smile, she looks up at me with her hands held high. Waiting for me to hold her. 

I can't describe the phenomenon. 

      Scoop her up always asking if she had any dreams. Allegedly never does. Rambling as I hold her, doing ballet turns until she giggles. 
      
      Her dad returns home from work an hour before I'm off. Expecting an hour to himself, mini me informs him about the other Micaela (me) in the household. Who takes good care of her. Demands he says hello. This is now how her father and I greet each other daily.



      As if it wasn't hard enough leaving the two munchkins I watched for a year. I can't imagine saying goodbye to mini me. 

Sunday, August 28, 2016

Potty training mini me Part III

      Only thing left is getting over the "taking a shit can hurt" relalization. To avoid the ohh so awful toilet, she doesn't dance or hide in a corner. What gives her away are the random statements while conversating.

So how'd summer camp go today?

"I don't have to go potty"


   
      I keep three books in the bathroom for her to read. Fuq that iPad. One is about sitting the hell down and trying to piss before leaving the house. 
      The other I scooped up is about how fantastic panties are. A page contains the days of the week on each pair. I sing it in the rhythm of the Happy Days theme song. While overhearing her reading on the shitter, she sings it too. 
      Lastly, the nitorious Everyone Poops.

In about a week this kid, very persistent to avoid big girl shit, is just about potty trained. 
Damn. 

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Building back Belle Isle


      Back in 2011 my friend took some hoop shots for my portfolio, and hers. We chose Belle Isle for the location. At that time the island had abandoned exhibits galore. Aquarium, conservatory, train station, and the nitorious zoo, all abandoned. Successfully broke into the zoo (shown in picture)

 

      Attended this years Belle Isle art fair. Haven't taken a visit since my sister and I took a visit in 2012. I was aware they opened a "feed the deer" trail for kids. (deer that will die come hunting season)
      The aquarium, conservatory, and train were all re-open! Was super pumped to run into sea horses. Jelly fish too. Disappointed they had no mermaids...

 

      On our journey to foods we passed up a flock of brothers coooking ribs. They clearly saw we smelled the amazing food and flagged us over. Turns out they were selling tickets to purchase food. Also got homemade Arnold Palmers. Sorry Arnie...This tea was far better with had no after taste. 

      If you visit Michigan, tour Detroit. Especially Belle Isle! All exhibits are free. 
      I'm in no way suggesting breaking into the zoo or responsible for consequences of doing so.

Familia at faja's

 

      My pops lives pretty close to the airport. Spent Sunday at his place during the air show. I know nothing about these two planes, besides they were loud as shit. 

 

      My sister and her husband always bring interesting candy to family functions. Last two times received a ziplock bag full of Gummie Bears. They got a pack of 467,000 (not literally 467,000). This time got a nifty sucker with a dead cricket inside. I'd like to find a local candy shop with ridiculously entertaining candies.

 

      Of course, I cared more for the food and hula hooping. My dads ribs are the cats meow. Seriously. Great day to hoop. Even my man picked one up. He tends to successfully do a crazy trick without noticing, and "has no idea what I'm talking about" once I tell him.
He must be a closet hooper.. who will one up me in a dance off someday.
No no, I think he's truly unaware of what he's doing. Just does it to make me happy. 

  

My notorious selfie while flying. Was taught how to fly by Wonder Woman's people. She was my nanny so we're pretty close. 

Sunday, August 21, 2016

Engagement party

      I've never experienced an engagement party until this weekend. Big brothas lovely lady is naturally classy. Also very traditional. The immediate families and a couple close friends of there's attended the party. The event was to introduce the families. Buuut everybody sat with the people they know. Sooo, big brotha and his lady had a few people introduce themselves and say an embarrassing story about one of them. 


For example
      Easy mac came out. Big brotha didn't add water. He thought it was that easy. Smell in the kitchen was as inconvenient as when you burn popcorn. 

 

      Lovely mother and I. Don't take from many of her lovely features sadly...only have her lips and jawline. Still can't find the picture of my dad in middle school. It's me...but a dude. Adore pictures with my ma. Especially this one. 

Saturday, August 20, 2016

Potty training mini me Part II

      If you read my first potty training trick up my sleeve, you know it was a success. Perfect for the stubborn toddler!
   
      Thursday I grabbed my TY plush doll. Made the doll an ugly diaper and pretty pair of underwear out of felt. Made her a toilet out of an old laundry detergent cap. Added blue felt, and a safety pin for the flush handle. Mini Micaela will be responsible for potty training Maria (I named the doll Maria, yes I named a doll).
      After mini Micaela awoke from her nap, introduced her to Maria. Said Maria was scared and needs her to also sit on the toilet to comfort her. 

 
"I'll sit on the potty, but can you ask Maria to leave...?"

      Didn't work as planned...She requests her iPad to watch PawPatrol on the shitter. Totally works, but claims she's not done peeing after half a friggen hour. 

 

      Later attempted to avoid giving her the iPad so she focuses on controlling her body.

"Micaela! Can you poop for me pleaseeeeeeeeee!?"

 

      I'm fresh out of ideas. Besides putting red in the toilet to make orange. If you have any ideas, please do share. 

Friday, August 19, 2016

Potty training mini me


      Recently I've been a nanny for a 3-year-old girl named Micaela. Honestly think I got the job because I'm also Micaela... The position ends in the fall when she starts preschool, if she's potty trained by then. 
      She requested me to get her a bag yesterday. Wasn't satisfied with the paper bag, needed a plastic one. The kid took the plastic bag, put it under her while already sitting, and pees. Even admitted she used it to piss, and don't give a fuck about no big girl shit. 

 

     My ma once used that blue toilet cleaner, discovered my piss made it green. That is literally how I learned yellow and blue make green. So I took some blue finger paint and mixed it with water in her munchkin toilet. The other day we mixed primary colors with clay. She only remembered how to make pink. After informing her of this blue water, she finally went pee. Looked at the water after...

 

      Refused to pour it into the toilet to flush. Must show mommy and daddy at their arrival. 
      Yellow doesn't make too many other colors. This won't last long. Today I have a more long term trick up my sleeve. 

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Do it like an Olympian

      Once upon a time I was a teen in track and field. Excellent sprinter since as long as I remember. Didn't find it fun at all, very intimidating. 
      What the hell is this concoction you call starting blocks? Does it really matter what hand I hold the baton in for a relay? Why are the starting lines on an angle? I failed math. 
      One of my first races was a relay. Three bitches take off before I get the baton. Pass them all up, hand my partner the baton. Awkwardly. Resulting in a face plant to the track with a tad momentum still in me. 

 

We were disqualified. 
Because the baton was in the wrong hand. 

      Never understood why it wasn't because of my fall. Apparently as long as your torso or lower half is past the line...you successfully finish. Didn't look as bad ass as Allyson Felix. At all. It was pretty horrible. But if you're gonna do it, do it like an Olympian. 

Monday, July 25, 2016

Slide

"No fear
No distractions 
Let that which does not truly matter slide."

 
 

Sometimes we need to run away. Sometimes I literally want to run, not caring where I end up. It's been exactly a year since life became a living nightmare. Instead of running I go to my happy place. 

A memory. 
From childhood.

I feel the bottom of the shallow pool
I smell fresh air
I taste lemonade
I see the favored tree right outside the fence
I hear the splashing


Open my eyes remembering reality was, and can again, be amazing.



Saturday, July 23, 2016

Lose yourself


Into the forest I go, to lose my mind and find my soul. 

 

A few years back while chilling with a friend, her dad claimed I'm just showing off with my hula hoop. That's the last impression I want to make. That's the last thing I need on my mind when hooping.  
At the park my "audience" consisted of homeless guys by the picnic table area, and an elder on a bike with his shirt rolled up 90's style. For the first time in awhile, nothing mattered when I danced

That moment when you get to lose yourself. 
Priceless. 

Saturday, July 16, 2016

Late



      Met up with the toddler, baby, and mother at a local park for a child care interview earlier. I was 25-minutes late. Blame uber. The interview was awkwardly interrupted by a girl scheduled to meet half an hour after me...she had her go bond with the toddler for the meantime. As we wrap things up, she has me watch the baby while she interviews the other chick.
      While doing so the baby kept starring at the other man with his toddler in the swing. Talking in a foreign language while pushing his son. Counting...un, deux, twas, quatre....I interrupt "cinq, six, sept, huit, neuf, dix!". He was French. Great way to kill time while with a baby. Learn more French. 



      Time goes by, I hear her wrap things up with the other girl. Just as the baby reached for me to be held I'd caught the toddler out my preffreal vision. Went to her stroller, tilted her head and sucked her thumb impatiently. With the baby I went over to her. The mother said that's never happened before, she usually rebels leaving the park.



      Gave the baby to her mother and approached the munchkin. Knelt down, put out my hand, and introduced myself. She shook my hand.  


      Once asking if she wanted to hula hoop, the littleun' jumped out of her stroller all like 'hellll yeahhhh'
     She kept having her mom do it who did, requested to jump through it while someone holds it up, and of course attempted around her waist. 

      Score

Have yet to hear back, as there's more people to interview. 
      

Thursday, July 14, 2016

Tastes at the moment


Music
Still into that murder rap. Having a taste for reggae lately. 

Reading
Living in a post-apocalyptic world due to the complete loss of Internet.
Check out the author's blog A Beer for the Shower.

Arts
Creative writing, baking (still horrible), and jewlery making. 

Politics
Why the hell would I talk politics on my blog? 

Athletics
Circus arts of course! This month is my 5-year-hoopiversary. I've messed with poi in the past. Now giving it a shot with double hoops vs. weighted tassels. 

Something random that happened this week
Learned card tricks. One of the two card tricks literally is magic. I have no friggen idea how it actually works. Every. Single. Time. 

Feel free to join in and post your at the moment tastes. Try to link back to Mind Your Madness. 

Wednesday, July 13, 2016

Forearm stand


      Wish I had a progress picture, like I do with the crow pose. Imagine this, but with a wall to assist my balance. Now you see a successful forearm stand.


      You're not putting any weight on your head. You're also not supposed to lift your head like I did in the first picture...

      More yoga is needed in my life. 

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

How to murder a zombie

      "Murder's out of tune, and sweet revenge grows harsh"


      Recall my recent investment from FiveBelow? It was growing, slowly but surely. Sir Panther (in-home cat sitting) had a rough time not eating it. After my trip to the hospital I came home to this...my fault honestly. Put it within cats reach, and expected my boyfriend to water it (HAH).


      I didn't murder my beloved plant, but feel death was the sweet revenge from karma.  
      Invested in another FiveBelow plant. Yes, it honestly hurt that bad to create life and watch it disintegrate. Bad enough to invest in these clovers. Let's see a four leafer sprout! In my dreams...


Sunday, July 10, 2016

Oliver and company

"As I kid we'd ride around Uncle Cleo's 88 acre farm in Kentucky. I fell in love with that tractor when I was a little kid. I remember one time when we just drove down, uncle Cleo came over the hill and I swore Oliver smiled at me when I saw him. Funny the things that kids see."
- My pops


      Once upon a time in 1957 my great grandpa invested in a (this) super 55 Oliver. After he passed, my Uncle Cleo inherited it. Cleo lived on the farm his whole life. No running water, electricity, had an outhouse, truly a southern hearted man



      Pops decided to give it a slick paint job in 2003 at his shop here in Detroit. Cleo wouldn't use it, claiming it's too shiny (U.Cleo is an adorable trip). So, he gave it back to my pops. Growing up my dad spent a lot of time on the farm with Cleo. Oliver and the farm bring some sort of nirvana to my dad. Both are gorgeous, can't doubt that. 


      After the ride was a beautiful country sky. Pops claims it's from the power of Oliver, haha. 

      Do you favor the city life, or country at heart?

Friday, July 8, 2016

Lotion for the skin


      For the summer, invested in Jergan's 3-day to natural glow lotion for the skin. As a ginger, I expected an odd color (if any) on my pasty pale skin. To my surprise, this stuff worked even for me. Literally a natural looking tan. The pigment of my skin seemed to slowly shift. No issues with hand, feet, or general color blobs. This is not sponsored content. I'm just in love. 

      Pixels blurred for better show of skin color appearance 

Unless you're a natural tanner, snatch one of these for the summer. 
Great for natural tanners to get that glow for winter seasons. 
Health too. Less tanning bed time!

Thursday, July 7, 2016

Song suggestion pick


      Song suggestions folded up. Shaken around in hat. Chose one piece. The pick was.....


      Bodies by Drowning pool

Suggested by Mich of The Bastard Henry

      Check back next week to view the video!!

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

Crazy 8

Age: 14 - 23
Visits: 8

      I'm not just a broken record. Imagine a "Benny and the Jets" record broken. That's me. 


      Third stay at an adult ward. First experience having a patient go through electro shock therapy (I thought that was illegal?).

      A fellow patient had allegedly gotten kicked out smoking in his bathroom. Soooo I smuggled in a cigarette and lighter. To the bathroom I went! Lit up. Blew a little smoke outside my bathroom door. Nothing. Blew it towards the smoke detector. Nothing. Blew it outside my bedroom door. NOTHING
      Ended up having to bribe a fellow friend with Reese's to snitch. Not straight up snitch, they'd find it odd we're still chill after. So she paced the hall, complained of smoke, and the search began
      The outcome was a warning of a $500 fine. Was also offered a nicotine patch. 

      Overall I did learn a lot this round. Discovered new things, focused only on myself. Additionally, I knew I was whack beforehand. Usually I'd think I'm "normal" and ignore all the info given. Let's hope it stays at 8. I know it will. 

Tuesday, June 28, 2016

The female Peter Pan


    If only kids truly knew how envious adults are of them. How much they can do while still in school. I wish my biggest problem in life could be the day I decided to go down the slide backwards. Not legal issues. No hospital stays. 


      Whether or not the fall hurt, it's still a shock. A nifty test to see if a toddler is actually crying in pain...fake cry with them. They'll stop and laugh if they're okay.


      Older sister went down the slide, falling onto the little one. Teaching her how to properly play. If only I could be a kid again...